Come to think of it; it seems that I have always wanted to know my true nature. I had questions about who I am, why I act like this, and why I have this personality. I did a lot to find the answer. I went to the cathedral and studied the Buddha’s words; no matter how much I read books of philosophy, I couldn’t find answers.
I often said to myself, “If I don’t know about me, than who else can know about me?”
Eventually, I started doing meditation. Through meditation practice, the misconception of who I am had disappeared like an onion getting peeled layer by layer. And then, my original nature began to appear. Ever since I was enlightened about who I am, my behaviors started to change.
I am still meditating, and the project of discovering myself is continually progressing. As I go deeper inside, there are many things I can understand more about myself. I realized so many things that I never even thought about before the meditation. The ‘me’ who was searching, and the ‘me’ who I was seeking to know was not the ‘Real Me.’ So, while meditating and eliminating the ‘Fake Me,’ I began to feel much freer and as I eliminated more of the fake me, I could see more of the real me. My happiness increased steadily, and all my doubts and negative feeling gradually vanished.
The questions of ‘Who am I, we don’t seem to know much about ourselves, but we want to know, just as Socrates did 2000 years ago. We keep looking for what we want to be in our imagination and always feel that we are not good enough, that we always have to reach for more to be satisfied.
The truth is that we don’t need anything else. We adding more things to a me that is just a product of my imagination does not make that me any more real.
The answer is to find the True me, the real me that is not a product of my mind but is within me and becomes visible when the clouds of the illusory me disappear.
It’s as if we are a bottle of beer but in our minds, we want to be an expensive scotch whiskey bottle even though I was born as a beer bottle. Thinking, why can’t I be a whiskey bottle? Beer bottles and whiskey bottles are all made of the same glass what difference does the shape make? The key is to accept yourself as a beer bottle as you are, love it, and happily fulfill your beer bottle duties. We are all here for a unique purpose and to fulfill that purpose is what brings happiness and joy. The problem is that a person’s mind is always like a fire burning with greed and obsession.
Of course, what you put in the bottle is also essential. Are you making beer bottles that only serve as trash bins with cigarette butts and dirt?
Or will it contain the finest handmade organic beer?
It’s up to you.
At that point, maybe God gave us free will. So, for me, meditation is the process of emptying the dirt from the beer bottle and filling it with high-quality alcohol. Empty the remnants of emotions and negative thoughts that fill your bottle, and then your bottle will be clean, and that is when you can accept as you are, which is the beer bottle. You will then gain the greatest freedom of your heart since you have become free from the agonies of wanting to become an expensive whiskey bottle. That is how we can understand what Socrates said, “Know thyself.”, which means each individual has to accept who they are instead of striving to become someone else.
It seems like I should stop asking myself questions about myself, which I habitually did and accept and acknowledge me as I am, as a bottle of beer. I have come a long way back to accept and admit to myself who I am.
How can I find who really I am? I am also sharing a simple but profound video that answers the fundamental
Written by Mago Kim
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